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R for Resolutions and Plans

lindamaycurry11 Comments

Georgy Girl

The Seekers 1966

Hey there, Georgy girl
Swingin’ down the street so fancy-free
Nobody you meet could ever see
The loneliness there
Inside you

Hey there, Georgy girl
Why do all the boys just pass you by?
Could it be you just don’t try
Or is it the clothes you wear?

Today, in April, 1967, I am turning 16, so my mother and I are celebrating by having lunch at the Camden Valley Inn.  My mother gave me a bracelet with my grandmother’s hair in it which I think is just amazing.  It is sure to be a conversation starter when I’m with other people. I’m in fifth year at Bowral High School and my name is Isabella.

My family is very small.  There is my mother, Elsa, my grandmother Kay (she changed her name from Myrtle) and my Great Uncle Claude.  My father died when I was 10, of a heart attack. My mother married him when she was 18. She had left Lucy Secors in Melbourne and was working as a receptionist in a hotel in Goondiwindi. My father was staying at the hotel and the rest is history.  I wasn’t born until 15 years later in Mildura, which is in far west Victoria. I think my mother is the most amazing person. She is a very successful businesswoman and has turned the business around since my father died.

My first school was in Sydney but we all moved to the country when I was six. I love the freedom, the space, the animals and the peace and quiet and I’m used to my own company. Exploring the gully behind my home and riding my bike are favourite activities.

For the Higher School Certificate I am studying English, History, Maths, Science, Geography and Art.  My favourite subject apart from English is Art, because it is so creative.  My mother says that when I complete the HSC we will fly to New Zealand for a holiday. It will be my first trip overseas.

I’m hopeless at competitive sport which may be because I’m short sighted.  I choose swimming every summer and tennis, table tennis or athletics in winter. I am involved in the Inter School Christian Fellowship and have been chosen to be President next year. That involves organising and leading meetings every Friday lunchtime which is a bit daunting but will improve my confidence in public speaking.

I spend far too much time watching TV instead of studying.  My favourite TV show is Star Trek.  I have a picture of Mr Spock in the lid of my school case.  I love anything to do with Space and Astronomy is my favourite part of Science.

I’m learning the piano and enjoy it but probably don’t practise enough. My mother can play by ear and is very good. Sewing is another of my hobbies. I make most of my own clothes and used to take sewing as a subject at school but dropped it after the School Certificate.

Another hobby is the Argonauts Club.  It is a radio program on at 5 o’clock every afternoon.  They are always asking for contributions to do with art, music, nature, drama, current affairs etc.and award blue certificates for the best ones. Six blues equals a book so I have added considerably to my library.  I also get the Childrens’ Newspaper and won a Malvern Star bicycle this year by writing lots of contributions for six months.

I am wearing my senior school uniform and posing with the bike I won.

When I finish my HSC I hope to get a scholarship to train to be a teacher.  I would like to teach English and History at high school but am also considering primary school teaching.  

I don’t go out much except to church at Colo Vale and Mittagong.  All my social activities revolve around church except for the school social which is held twice a year. We have to practise old time dancing for a few weeks before the social, including the waltz, Canadian Three Step, Pride of Erin and Progressive Barn Dance.

I do a lot of reading, mainly books by authors we study at school.  I have read most of Jane Austin, Charles Dickens, D.H. Lawrence and Thomas Hardy.  The saddest book is Tess of the D’Urbervilles which ends with the doomed Tess and Angel meeting at Stonehenge. That brings me back to my plans.  After I teach for three years I will resign, travel by ship to England and teach in London.  From there I will be able to travel all over Europe.  I don’t want to get married until I am 26 so I have a lot to look forward to.  The next ten years will be very exciting!

Q for Questions About the Future

lindamaycurry9 Comments

As Time Goes By

Sung by my favourite singer, Rudy Vallee 1931

You must remember this
A kiss is still a kiss
A sigh is just a sigh
The fundamental things apply
As time goes by

And when two lovers woo, they still say, “I love you”
On that you can rely
No matter what the future brings
As time goes by

It is the 25th August, 1933 and it is my 16th birthday.  My name is Elsa May Hall although my birth certificate says Elsie Mary Hall.  The woman who registered my name made a mistake with my middle name and I don’t like Elsie.  Elsa is much more grown up.

This is me when I was younger. I can’t find any recent photos.

My mother gave me a gold bracelet for my 16th birthday.  She wants to start a family tradition of passing it down to the firstborn girl in each generation of the family.  I wonder will I have a daughter to give it to?  I find it a bit unusual as it has her hair plaited inside it.  Apparently, some admirer of hers gave it to her but she didn’t marry him.  When she was 20 she ran away with a much older man (my father) and they were married in Melbourne. I was born in 1917 in a little railway cottage in Williamstown.  My mother was very sick afterwards and nearly died.  I started school in Williamstown when I was six so I was much older than the other children.  I was only at the school a short while when my mother said, “We are leaving on a train to go to Sydney today.” I didn’t ever see my father again.

Mother rented a house in Glebe and I started school at Forest Lodge.  I was happy there, as I made one very close friend called Ruth.  My favourite thing to do when I got home from school was to ride my scooter down the gently sloping path in Jubilee Park.  Ruth told me I was too old to ride a scooter but I loved the feeling of speed and the wind in my hair. I remember one day when I was in sixth class rushing in the front door, telling my mother excitedly about my promotion in the netball team.  She told me to sit down and listen.  She said that times were hard and dressmaking jobs were scarce so we were moving to Queensland.  She had a job at a cattle station as a housekeeper and cook so there would be food, accommodation and some money as well.  I didn’t realise that the cattle station was a long way from the nearest town of Charleville.  Nor did I realise the nearest high school was in Roma, hundreds of miles away.

It took several days to travel to Roma by train.  Instead of going to the cattle station, Mother took me to a hostel for students whose homes were a long way from the school.  I hated it.  I didn’t make friends and the food was awful.  I started school at Roma High School but was very unhappy.  In fact, I thought about running away but where would I go? I sent so many letters to Mother she must have realised that something needed to be done.  One weekend she arrived and took me to a house near the school.  The owner had a spare bedroom and said she would treat me like her own daughter.  At least now I had my own room but I didn’t like the woman at all.  She would make notes if I did anything to displease her and then she would send letters to my mother.  She also expected me to do housework the minute I got home from school and I didn’t think that was part of the agreement so we argued a lot.

It all came to an end when I made a friend.  Like me, he was an outsider.  His parents were Greek and ran the local fish and chip shop. We would walk home from school together and one day the snoopy landlady saw us.  Of course, she wrote to Mother straight away and said I was “boy mad”.  Mother arrived next weekend and decided that as I was almost 15, it was time to leave school and start dressmaking.

I thought I might be living with Mother at the station but a letter arrived to say my father had died and his sister (my aunt) was offering me accommodation while I did my training as a dressmaker.  Before I knew it, I was travelling by train to Williamstown, which I had left nearly ten years earlier.

I am now working at Lucy Secors.  It is a dressmaking firm which employs hundreds of girls, training them from the ground up.  I spend two or three months perfecting each part of a garment.  Starting with seams I progressed to collars and then to sleeves and buttonholes.  It is all very boring.  My aunt and uncle are quiet people, and my cousin is not at all exciting.  

1927 advertisement in “The Home” magazine for Lucy Secor from Circa Vintage Clothing Archive 4th June 2015

So here I am.  Everyone expects me to work my way up through the ranks at Lucy Secors until I become a manager or get married.  I have a good mind to pack it in at the end of the year and go back up to Queensland.  Maybe I can get a job dressmaking with what I have learnt. What does my future hold? I hope it’s a bit more exciting than my life has been so far.  Things have got to get better.

P for Plaiting a lock of my long fair hair

lindamaycurry16 Comments

When You Were  Sweet Sixteen

I love you as I never lov’d before,

Since first I met you on the village green

Come to me, or my dream of love is o’er.

I love you as I lov’d you

When you were sweet, when you were sweet sixteen.

Written by James Thornton 1896 

It is August the 8th, 1913 and I have just turned 16.  My name is Myrtle May Lock but everyone calls me Tillie because I hate my name.  I have a sister called Ruby (she hates her name too) who is 12, a brother called Charles (known as Charlie) aged 10 and a little brother called Claude, aged 7. Claude fell off the bed on his head when he was a baby and has never been quite right since.  He is always sick and misses so much school.  As a result, I missed a lot of school too, looking after him as Mother is often unwell.  I left as soon as I could at the age of 13 so did not ever go to high school.

Father said I had to have a trade as I should not have to depend on the family or a husband to provide for me.  I had the choice of dressmaking or millinery.  I decided that dresses were more important than hats and liked the idea of working with clean, soft material instead of my parent’s job running a smelly fish shop. At least Father now sells second hand goods and Mother can rest a bit more.

As the oldest in the family, I am always expected to do most of the work.   My sister Ruby avoids it when possible and is very demanding. When Father bought a cow everyone wanted to learn to milk it.  Everyone but me.  I knew that when the novelty wore off, I would be the one getting up early in the morning to milk the cow. I can’t avoid the weekly silver polishing, however.  Every Saturday morning, we four children must sit at the table and polish all the cutlery, the teapot, coffee pot, sugar bowl and milk jug.  When I have my own home, I’m not having anything made of silver.  Why make work for yourself?

As it is I work long hours five days a week at the dressmakers, measuring the ladies and drafting patterns for their gowns. I do most of the stitching by hand although we have a Singer treadle sewing machine for making linings in some of the dresses. We receive copies of the latest European fashions in magazines like “Gazette du Bon Ton” from France and “Harpers Monthly” from America.

That reminds me.  I was reading a magazine a few days ago and it went into great detail about the “unsinkable ship”, the Titanic, which hit an iceberg travelling from England to America. Over a thousand people drowned.  I have decided I am never going on a ship, ever.

Have you seen my birthday present?  Oh, I know I received the usual handkerchiefs, combs and linen for my glory box but wait until you see what else I have.  

I have an admirer!  He is much older than me and isn’t all that good looking, but he is very kind and has a lovely big house.  My father doesn’t approve of him so all I will say is that his initials are S.B. He asked for a lock of my hair!  In fact, he said, “Please may I have a lock from Miss Lock”.  I didn’t know what he was going to do with it but I snipped a long strand for him to take away with him.  Today he presented me with a blue velvet box.  I opened it carefully and inside was a gold bracelet!  It looked as though some plaited leather was threaded through the gold but it turns out, it was my hair.  On the inside is inscribed “From S.E.B. 9-8-13” and on the outside, in a gold shield, are my initials, MML. I shall wear it all the time.

I think my father thinks if I leave home and marry S.B there will be no one to help my mother but then it will be Ruby’s turn.  It’s time she did her share!

Father has stopped me from doing many exciting things.  Just recently a new photographic shop opened in the main street of Stawell.  I was looking at the pictures in the window when the owner came outside and asked if I would like to have my photograph taken.  He said he would put it in the front window to show people what he could do.  I had to wrap a sheet around my shoulders and let my hair down to my waist.  You should have heard the gossips when my photograph appeared in the window. The photographer told me a week or so later that a friend from Melbourne had seen the picture and thought I should try out to be a model for the big department store Myer. My father said no way would he let me go and model in Melbourne so I am doomed to spend my life in Stawell sewing dresses for wealthy ladies who seem to have a lot more fun than I do.

I wonder what the future holds?   Will I marry S.E.B.?  Will I leave Stawell and live somewhere more exciting, like Melbourne?  Will I have children and grandchildren? Will I be happy? Only time will tell.

O for Occupying Myself During Treatment

lindamaycurry16 Comments

The New Zealand actor, Sam Neill, wrote his memoir “Did I Ever Tell You This” while steroids kept him awake at night. He was diagnosed with angioimmunoblastic T-cell lymphoma, a rare, aggressive type of non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma. He is currently in remission but with infusions every two weeks to keep it at bay. His memoir is not about cancer as that is something he wants to put at the back of his mind. Such an inspiration and role model!

It would be good if I could say I learnt a new skill or wrote the great novel during my self-enforced hibernation.

The piano lay untouched when I could have been practising.  The Swedish Death Cleaning which I so enthusiastically started, lapsed into apathy. My days followed a regular rhythm of meal prep, cleaning up and washing and drying clothes.  The rest of the time was spent reading or listening to audio books.  I attempted to complete Sudokus, enjoyed Wordle and Quordle and Octordle. Pilfer had me playing against the computer and winning (on level 1). Watching TV took place mainly in the evenings and occasionally at lunchtime, when I enjoyed Escaping to the Country and drooling over beautiful houses.  The summer drifted by, largely spent indoors with the air conditioning on.

Writing my daily journal was a ritual before bed each night, listing my side effects and comparing them with the previous cycle. Not exactly a memoir!

There was something I needed to complete before March as my granddaughter’s 16th birthday was approaching.  It is a family tradition to pass on to the next generation a gold bracelet belonging to my grandmother.  She had been given the bracelet when she turned 16, in 1913.  She gave it to my mother when she turned 16.  In turn it was passed on to me at the same age.  When my daughter’s turn came she asked if I would look after it as she went travelling all over the world. It was still in my care as the time came again to pass it on to the next generation.

The owner of the bracelet, Myrtle May Lock

I came up with a plan to write a series of stories called “When I was 16”, showing how life has changed for teenagers over the past hundred years.  I was fortunate to have some lovely photographs of my grandmother around that age but only younger ones of my mother so that would have to do.  I looked back to my own life at 16 and asked my daughter to write about her life at that time as well.  There was such a contrast in the lives of the four women in the stories.  For my granddaughter the significance of the bracelet would be multiplied by the stories of its owners.

In the next post you will go back in time to 1913 and find out the origin of the gold bracelet.

N for News Good and Bad

lindamaycurry7 Comments

N for News Good and Bad

On Thursday, 15th January I was due to have a PET scan to see if the first four rounds of chemo had destroyed the lymphoma.  John dropped me off at Wollongong Hospital and I found my way to Lumus Imaging on Level 1.  I was asked to strip to underwear and given a purple paper gown to wear which was open down the back.  I’m always wary of cannulas as my veins are small and hard to find but the nurse placed it first go with no pain.  I told her she could do it every time and asked could I keep her for future scans.

The next hour was spent reclining under a warm blanket while first saline and then radioactive sugar solution was infused.  I then had to lie still for an hour and regretted not being able to access my headphones and audio book. Still, I was warm and comfortable.  I was then taken into a radioactive room where I lay with my knees and head supported by a pillow.  The scan seemed to go on forever and must have taken 40 minutes.

The following Tuesday I felt quite confident as I had viewed the scans online and there didn’t seem to be any areas glowing red or orange. The haematologist seemed preoccupied and after asking how I was going announced all the markers for lymphoma had disappeared. However, he had a new area of concern, the fatty areas of the abdomen. He pushed down on my tummy and asked if it hurt, which it did because he pushed hard.  As he didn’t have the original scan from the private hospital he needed to access it to compare with the more recent one.  There seemed to be unusual activity in the fat of the abdomen which could be caused by the chemo but could be new lymphoma. He would ring me later this afternoon.

We were ushered out the door and I didn’t even have time to ask any questions.  Of course I checked out AI when I got home and it made me feel a bit better.

Most Likely Cause: Post-Treatment Inflammation

Treatment Side effects:  Chemotherapy, immunotherapy, or radiation can cause temporary inflammation of fatty tissues (sometimes referred to as panniculitis)

There was some good news that day.  The Travel Insurance Company reimbursed us for the money we lost when cancelling our holiday.  We also went out for dinner at an Italian Restaurant which was special because it was our first meal out since chemo started.

The next day the haematologist rang to say there was no inflammation of the fatty tissue of the first scan so it may have been caused by the chemo.  The next PET scan will be four weeks after chemo has finished so hopefully any effects from chemo will have disappeared.

Fast forward to Tuesday 31st March, 2026.

Another PET scan but this time a different nurse had two goes at inserting the cannula, first the right arm and then the left.  It really hurt both times going in.  After the PET scan I stayed on the bed while iodine was inserted in the cannula for the CT scan.  It makes you feel like you have peed yourself when you really haven’t. At least the CT scan was not too long and I was shivering and keen to get out of there by the end.  All I could think about was going home to my sunny kitchen and eating weet-bix, yoghurt and fruit.

Lumus Imaging inside Wollongong Public Hospital

Thursday, 2nd April, the day before my 75th birthday, the news was not as good as I’d hoped.  The glow in the fatty areas in my abdomen had grown larger but the haematologist thinks it is harmless. It is probably “fat necrosis” which is fat tissue which has died from lack of blood supply caused by the chemotherapy. As a friend of mine said, “surely dead fat is good!”

Just because there is a remote possibility it could be new lymohoma I have to have another visit to hospital, this time for a laparoscopy.  I have an appointment with a laparascopic surgeon on the 9th April at 1.15 pm so will see what transpires. Unfortunately that is my husband’s birthday so it looks like dinner out, not lunch. Unless they decide to whack me into hospital there and then. Deja Vu!!!

M for Medication, Eating and Drinking

lindamaycurry10 Comments

When I first came home from hospital, I was given a hand-written chart with all my medications, their purpose and when to take them. Some days, especially early in the cycle, involved many more tablets than later in the cycle.  I decided to list them on a Friday when my medications were at their maximum just to see what was going into my body and why.

  1. Allopurinal is for kidney protection and works by reducing the production of uric acid
  2. Pantaprazole is an antacid and treats heartburn and acid reflux
  3. Valaciclovic is an anti-viral and importantly keeps shingles at bay
  4. Ondansentron prevents nausea and vomiting
  5. Prednisolone is a steroid taken for four days after chemo that manages side effects and also destroys cancer cells
  6. Resprim Forte is an antibiotic taken three times a week in a low dose
  7. Loratadine is an antihistamine which helps reduce bone pain after a Pelgraz injection
  8. Pelgraz injection (given by nurse four days after chemo) stimulates the bone marrow to make more white blood cells
  9. Panadol helps with pain from Pelgraz injection
  10. Temazapan helps with sleep while taking Prednisolone (steroids)
  11. Two sachets of Movacol with water plus Coloxyl tablets help with constipation caused by chemo. 
  12. Atorvastatin for cholesterol (a pre-existing medication)

Once the six cycles had finished I was reduced to taking 1, 2, 3, 6 and 12..

Six weeks later I am down to 3,6 and 12.

It is rather confronting to be pouring all these medications into one’s body but most of them are trying to repair the damage caused by the chemotherapy so the thought of not having them is even more alarming.

When I began treatment for DLBCL (Diffuse Large B-Cell Lymphoma) I was told I had to avoid certain foods as my immunity would be low.  It included a few of my favourite things such as oysters, sushi and soft cheeses. Generally, one has to avoid raw, undercooked or unpasteurised foods, so the rare steak with blood dripping from it or the runny boiled eggs for dipping soldiers in were off the menu.

Deli meats are also discouraged because of the potential for listeria.  Salami, bacon and ham with their high fat and salt content are also not recommended.  I didn’t realise this until I had devoured a large portion of the Christmas ham. Raw foods must be carefully washed so my salad spinner became a regular kitchen tool, removing water from grapes, raspberries, blueberries and strawberries.  Pasteurised yoghurt was safe to eat, but not kombucha, according to my research.

The greatest impact on my routine was the consumption of alcohol.  Chemotherapy drugs put a huge strain on the liver, so the extra strain caused by alcohol could cause inflammation or worse.  As well, alcohol can worsen nausea, dehydration and fatigue. It was a no brainer to stop my two drinks a day habit.

Five o’clock in the evening and my usual glass of white wine had to be replaced, possibly forever, but with what?

Almost immediately my Face Book was inundated with suggestions for non-alcoholic drinks. I have tried many in the last five months and still have not discovered the perfect one. My favourite is still tonic water with ice and lemon.  I buy the low sugar variety and hope it doesn’t do too much harm.

Heineken Zero beer is a pleasant drink, even for a non-beer drinker like me.  There is a hops based drink called Hopr which appears on my Face Book quite regularly so I decided to give it a try.  

The Hopr drinks have a slightly bitter taste that takes a while to get used to, are refreshing and not sweet. I found some varieties tasted better than others but served in a wine glass it is a pleasant drink to sip while preparing the evening meal.  

I used to have a glass of red wine with dinner but not any more. Some wine substitutes I tried were from the Altina drinks collection. For Christmas Day I celebrated with s Sparkling Sansgria.  Although I enjoyed it the first few times I had it it is not something I could drink on a regular basis.  There is also a Sparkling Rose which is quite drinkable but when the alcohol is taken out of wine it definitely loses something.

I broke the drought and had a glass of champagne on my birthday, six weeks after I finished chemo. Six days later I had one on John’s birthday. However, I have decided to limit alcohol intake to small amounts on special occasions.

L for Living Life Every Day

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 After a few cycles I almost knew what to expect on each and every day. Walking out of the Cancer Care Centre was the most wonderful feeling of freedom with a whole three weeks ahead before it started again.  This is what I wrote after the first visit to the Day Centre.

John dropped me off at the front.  I walked into the Cancer Care section and took the lift up to the 2nd floor.  Wrong.  Down to the first floor.

I had to wait in the waiting room for ten minutes.  Then I was introduced to my nurse Mia and shown to a reclining chair.

The order of chemo was changed from the one I had in hospital.  The Retuximab was infused first and took several hours. The other drugs all took less time and I was all finished in about five hours. My nurse was a senior nurse but she had just returned from maternity leave and said even in ten months things had changed a lot.  She was being reaccredited so had another nurse watching and discussing everything that took place.  All went well except it took two goes to get the cannula into a vein.

I came home with a bag of goodies, creams, mouthwash, lip balm.  Also chose two turbans made by local sewers for free. One I like because you can thread a scarf through it which gives it a bit more bulk.  I will try to buy some scarves in different colours for the other hats I have.

The time was filled with reading and listening to my audio books. Once a volunteer chaplain stopped by to talk. I told her I wasn’t religious but was happy to talk anyway. I had imagined that I might chat to the other people getting their infusions but they were too far away and every time I went there were different people in the chairs. The nurses were looking after several people at once so didn’t have much time to talk either. I did notice before Christmas that they wore colourful festive uniforms and asked if they were supplied. It seems they have to buy them but they can put them aside to use next year. They are a long way from the starched white dresses of the old days but far more practical and comfortable.

After each infusion, days 1 to 6 were not too unpleasant. Sometimes I had energy thanks to the steroids and was motivated to clean out cupboards and place unwanted goods on Marketplace. I might have a slight headache or feel a bit groggy but it was bearable.  The main problem was not being able to sleep at night so the doctor gave me a prescription for Temezapam which was to be used only when absolutely necessary.  I found I didn’t need it after the first few days. On the fourth day I would report to my Medical Centre for have an injection of Pelgraz, which stimulates the bone marrow to produce more white blood cells.  It was suggested I might like to do this injection in the stomach myself but I vehemently declined as I can’t even stand to look at needles.

The side effects of Pelgraz are bone pain but I found taking an anti-histamine and Panadol removed any unpleasant symptoms for a while at least.

Day 7 was usually a shock as each cycle I dared to hope that it would be different to last time.  It’s funny how memories fade and If I hadn’t written down how I felt it I would not believe it.  The effect of the steroids wore off and all of a sudden the whole body reacted to the drugs killing the cancer cells.  I think I was lucky because I have read of people who were much worse off than I was.

For about seven days it felt a bit like having the flu.  All my body ached, with swollen glands and blocked ears. My feet swelled up so that shoes no longer fitted, sore spots appeared in my mouth and throat to make eating and swallowing difficult, appetite disappeared and a mild feeling of nausea was ever present.  Tummy upsets were common and constipation became so serious I rang a lovely, kind cancer care nurse called Jewel who suggested I come in for an X-ray.  Much as I didn’t want to go back to the hospital I agreed and was cheered by the fact that there was nothing copious glasses of Movacol and Coloxyl wouldn’t fix.  I learnt to be better prepared in future.

I noticed numbness on my fingertips and in my toes.  This spread along the soles of my feet.  It wasn’t painful, just strange, like walking on soft straw.  The doctor said it was neuropathy and to prevent it getting worse he left Vincristine out of my sixth and last cycle. The strength in my legs reduced markedly.  Whereas before I could easily stand up out of a lounge chair while holding a tray I now had to place the tray on the floor and use the arm of the chair to help me stand.

As my hair began thinning John cut it short so the pillow was no longer covered in hair.  Eventually I asked him to give me a buzz cut which looked better than wispy bits of hair standing on end. My big toenails turned black and started lifting off, maybe from the pressure of my shoes so I invested in a pair of wide toed joggers and socks with individual toes.

Fortunately these symptoms didn’t all appear at the same time and there were medications for nausea, a mouthwash for the Mucositis (sore mouth and throat), Panadol for aches and pains and no need to do anything but try and get a meal on the table at night.  The frozen meals were a godsend.

Then around day 14 I would begin to feel normal.  After each cycle I noticed a few more symptoms lingering but on the whole I felt ready to face it all again by the time day 21 arrived.

What a relief each time I left the Cancer Car Centre, especially after infusion number 6.

K for Kindness

lindamaycurry13 Comments

When people hear that someone has cancer they are often unsure what to do and say.  I wasn’t expecting to hear from anyone except for my family but even in my short time in hospital I had an unexpected visit from a friend who brought some mandarins and lots of good cheer.

It wasn’t long before friends from the General Bewilderment Lane (that’s what we originally called our Aqua Fit group when we were Aqua Joggers) were calling to see when they could visit.  I was very aware of my low immunity so we agreed on no hugs and even masks on the first few occasions. A knock at my front door one day revealed flowers and soaps from the thoughtful Aqua Joggers.

They arrived in pairs with coffee from Mo at Praha, the coffee shop at the uni pool.  He had made it just how I like it. They helped us put the cover on the caravan and move it to its parking space in the back yard.  After all, it wasn’t going to be used for a while.

More Aqua Joggers arrived, armed with take away coffee and muffins, but when I worked out my good days I started making coffee for them with my new coffee machine.  It is a Breville Barista Pro, replacing my old one which was due for retirement. Another “Why Not?” purchase.

One couple brought us a chicken pie to save on cooking.  This was most welcome as my main motivation when cooking is hunger and my appetite had gone.

Out of the blue another group, my daughter’s Book Club, donated Dinner Ladies’ meals to save on cooking.  

My daughter had also arranged for John to order some Light and Easy meals.  My Hello Fresh subscription supplied three meals a week which still had to be prepared and cooked but required very little thinking. It looked like we weren’t going to starve and I found once the food was in front of me, I could eat it and maintain my weight.

One friend remained quiet for a few weeks. Then I received a message from her asking when we were going out for lunch.  It seems she deleted her emails and missed my message about my health crisis.  As soon as she found out I had cancer she came over to our house, laden with flowers and rich little cakes from Massimos. 

Emails, phonecalls and texts kept me in touch with the outside world.  One friend wanted to know all the details of my diagnosis and treatment which gave me free reign to vent.

When I finally returned to Aqua Fit four weeks after my final chemo it was wonderful to catch up with people who had been so kind during my self-imposed isolation. As John and I were having birthdays in April one lovely Aqua Jogger made us a cake which we shared over coffee.

Christmas occurred in the middle of my treatment.  My children and grandchildren arrived with promises that I was to sit and watch and do nothing.  It was the easiest Christmas I have ever had although I did manage to prepare a trifle in advance and a “do it yourself” prawn cocktail where everyone peeled their own prawns and added lettuce, avocado, mango and homemade sauce. Best of all, the cleaning up was not my responsibility.  Instead, I spent a blissful afternoon resting on my bed underneath the fan.

As someone who values independence above all things and is a bit of a loner, it was strange and touching to have so much attention from others. It shows the importance of belonging to groups and has motivated me to help others in a similar situation when and where I can.

J for Justifying a Cleaner

lindamaycurry14 Comments

 I used the word justify because it starts with J but I had decided almost as soon as I was diagnosed that I was done with cleaning bathroom tiles and kitchen cupboards.  I asked around but cleaners were hard to find.  They all seemed to have a full workload and were not taking on any new clients.

It was then I tried Hi Pages and received three responses from companies who employed cleaners. The one I chose replied immediately and agreed to come and meet with me.  Her name was Lyn* and she had recently been put in charge of all the personnel involved in house cleaning for their company.  Her sister had had cancer and she had shaved her head in solidarity. She would make sure that I had the same person each week and that precautions would be taken in consideration of my low immunity. My new cleaner, Carol*, was to start on Thursday.

That gave me a few days to tidy the house in readiness.  On Thursday morning 9 o’clock arrived but there was no Carol.  At 9.10 am I rang Lyn.  She had just heard from Carol, who was knocking on the door next to the garage but said there was no response.  I told her there was no door next to the garage but to walk up the steps on the left-hand side to a deck where she would find the front door and us waiting for her.

There is no door next to the garage! What was she thinking?

All went quiet.  Lyn had given me Carol’s number but there was no response.  As for Lyn she said couldn’t talk because she was in a meeting.

It was almost midday when my phone rang.  

“You were trying to call me?” a woman’s voice asked.

“I’ve been trying to call you all morning,” I said.  I’ve been waiting for you to clean my house in K…. “

“I’ve already cleaned a house in K…,” she said, and gave my address.

Then the penny dropped.  Some time ago a mischievous person had turned our street sign around so that it pointed in another direction.  As most people use satellite navigation it hadn’t occurred to me that Carol would be looking at street signs.  She told me that she pulled up at a house with the same number as ours and climbed the stairs to the right (not the left as instructed).  An old lady answered the door and seemed to be expecting her.

“I’m so glad you’ve come,” she said. “My name has been down for a cleaner for such a long time as I’m not very well.”

Carol cleaned her house and then moved on to another job.  After talking to me she realised she had just cleaned a house for free. The woman had probably signed up to a Home Care Package as part of Aged Care Assistance at Home. Sometimes it takes a long time for the system to process. Carol was not sorry for her good deed as she felt the woman really needed help. As for my cleaning job I would have to contact Lyn and arrange another day for Carol to come to my house.

Contacting Lyn proved to be a problem. It wasn’t until the next day that she replied to my phone calls. Her company had restructured its organisation and decided to remove house cleaning from its services. That’s what the meeting was about!  No wonder she wasn’t in a hurry to speak to me!

She did say that Carol might be available as a private cleaner so I followed that option and lined her up for the following Monday.  I also contacted the Council to report the matter of a faulty street sign, which, to their credit, they remedied within a few days.

*Not their real names

I for Infusion Day

lindamaycurry21 Comments

Half Yours won the Melbourne Cup ridden by female jockey Jamie Melham.

The day that stops a nation was memorable in other ways for me.  It was Infusion Day.

It began at 5 am, when I had blood pressure taken, shower at 6 am, breakfast at 8 am followed by the Registrar who came around and explained how the chemotherapy would be administered.

The nurse assigned to the task was carrying out this procedure for the very first time. As a result, she encountered some difficulty while attempting to insert a new cannula.

She tried about four spots and kept saying sorry.  The senior nurse came in eventually and put it in first attempt. It is still there in case I need any more drugs administered.

At 11.30 the Doxorubicin was first drug of my treatment. It stops cancer cell division and side effects include hair loss, nausea, fatigue and potential long-term heart damage. It glowed bright red and was administered slowly with a large syringe into the cannula by the junior nurse who was dressed from head to toe in plastic.  She was very nervous but was watched closely by her superior. It took about 15 minutes and we were all relieved when it was over. 

The next syringe held Vincristine which took about 10 minutes to infuse.  Apparently, this drug prevents cancer cells from forming new cells and triggers cell death. Side effects include Neuropathy in hands and feet, severe constipation, hair loss, fatigue, muscle weakness and low white blood cell count which increases risk of infection. Unaware of these dire side effects I was just happy that the young nurse was becoming more confident. 

Cyclophosphamide was next and this time I was hooked up to the machine for about an hour.  It works by damaging the DNA of cancer cells, preventing them from dividing and multiplying. Side effects include hair loss, nausea and reduced white blood cell counts. 

A saline drip was used between each application. The final infusion was to take four or five hours in case of an allergic reaction. Retuximab works by blocking the protein that causes cancer cells to grow and multiply.  Side effects can be fever, chills, rash and fatigue, even pneumonia! Every half hour a new bag was attached.   Some orderlies arrived to take me off for the breast biopsies but I was all tied up and couldn’t go.  My haematologist dismissed the biopsies and said they probably weren’t necessary as any anomalies in the breast could be put down to lymphoma.  I was in no position to argue. 

I’m home again.  Hard to believe but here I am.

This morning I thought I would be just resting but a nurse came in for three vials of blood before disappearing.  I had woken at 3.30 am and lay awake until 5 am when my blood pressure was taken. I must have dozed off until 7.30 am when the breakfast arrived.  Not sure when the vampire visit took place.

The haematologist came around and gave a prognosis.  75% to 80% chance of recovery after first six rounds of chemo.  If it failed I could do a second or a third round if necessary.  That seems a long way away and I’m surprisingly sanguine about the whole thing.

I was wheeled off for my MRI in my bed which felt very decadent.  My trolley pusher was a student at Wagga Uni doing early childhood education.  He was discussing it with another bed pusher. The MRI took about an hour and a half. I’m an old hand at these now.  I’m just glad I’m not paying for all these tests.

The Haematologist came back in.  He cancelled the heart fluid test as it was taking too long to organise.  He said if there was fluid around the heart it was because of the lymphoma and the treatment would sort it out.  I was happy to go home and called John.  We were not allowed to escape that easily as we had to wait for the Pharmacologist to explain all the medication and what it was for.  She drew up a chart which outlined what to take each day.  A nurse brought over some papers to sign and I was free.

Very happy to be home!

Maybe it was all a dream.  It didn’t happen and I will wake up in the morning as normal.  But no, there is a huge stack of tablets to take after breakfast.